McFuzzington’s Great Escape
by Sujita Dhakal
Perspective: Common Brushtail Possum
Get directions: 37°48’00.2″S 144°57’48.2″E
Hi everyone, I am McFuzzington, Prince Possum the Great of Parkville Kingdom, a survivor of a thousand campus catastrophes.
My ancestors ran far and wide in these beautiful lands of meadows and bushes long before you humans built your shrine of knowledge here. And yet, now and then you pounce upon us with your square-shaped shiny devices, loud, clumsy, and completely unaware of our personal space.
Take last night, for example. I was making my daily evening rounds doing my dare-devil balancing act on the wire. I suddenly felt the air erupt with a monstrous sound. BOOM!! I could feel my heart in my mouth.
I shivered, but somehow, I bolted. Into my trusted tree, my fortress of solitude, my solace. But no! You humans were everywhere—dancing, shrieking, waving your flashing rectangles at me like Hogwarts students casting spells. Thank goodness, I did not see any wands nearby. Phew!!
“Oh my God, look! A possum!”
Yes. A possum. Congratulations on your exceptional observational skills, you stinky two-legger.
“Let’s get a picture!”
“No, no, a video would look even better!”
Now, let me ask you something: Why are humans so loud? No, seriously. What part of your evolutionary journey made you think, “Ah yes, let’s scream at things for fun”? I don’t get it. You see a possum? You scream. You see a spider? You scream. You see your score after finals? Guess what? You scream, and that’s just for fun.
Why? Do I look like I consented to this? I look like I just woke up from a night terror. No no!!
My brain froze then, not knowing what to do. I was a mess surveying the chaos from above. The ground had become an impenetrable maze of stomping feet and clinking glass. The air reeked of burnt leaves and fried sadness.
All I wanted to do was to run somewhere no humans could find me when one of you leaned in too close, flashing a blinding light at my face.
“McFuzzington! Look at me, buddy!”
Sir. Do I in any way look like I am up for a photo op?
You humans have no concept of boundaries. You keep following me with your glowing rectangles. One girl even says, “Omg, he’s so cute, let’s touch him!”
Ma’am, let me break this to you: I am allowed to bite you, and ruin your semester by a well-placed rabies scare.
Enough was enough. I took a deep breath, clenched my tiny paws, and made a daring leap from my tree to a lower branch. The crowd gasped. I dashed down, zigzagging past oversized feet. My only hope? The sanctuary of the Great Bushes near the Forbidden Library.
I ran. A blur of fur and sheer desperation. And then: darkness. Silence. I wanted to forget the horrors I had just endured.
One day; perhaps, you will change. Maybe you will understand that the world is not yours alone. You will learn that McFuzzington, Prince Possum the Great of Parkville Kingdom, deserves his moment of peace.
Fancy responding to the Common Brushtail Possum?
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Sujita Dhakal is a Gender and Forestry professional based in Nepal. She is a student at the University of Melbourne and a Wattle Fellow. She believes that we can make this world a better place.
Words from Sujita
I attended an event last semester in the courtyard with loud music and dancing. In that event, I saw a scared Possum running for his life amidst the people trying to capture a glimpse of him or to take some pictures. On one hand, it felt nice to see the cute animal. On the other hand, I felt bad as we were bothering him with the unwanted attention and loud music. That is why I wanted to write this from his perspective.
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